digimon; Truth | Kari

[kitsuneasika.livejournal.com]

Title: Truth
Character(s): Kari
Summary: Sometimes, she wonders if she's really as selfless as everyone thinks.
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon.
Notes: I adore this girl. She's pretty much my favorite character and her selflessness is something I admire.

Truth

Sometimes, she wonders if she's selfish. If her need to keep hurtful things locked up inside where their sharp edges and pointed tips can't tear at anyone but her is really selfishness in disguise. If some little part of her secretly revels in this, thinking, 'Oh, look at me! Look at how selfless and giving I am!'

She doesn't think there is, but she can never be certain. She thinks back to the day when she tells Yolei that she and Ken are alike, that the darkness likes them for bottling things up inside. She thinks back, and tries to remember if she felt the tiniest bit of satisfaction from this. If she gloated, even for a moment, in being similar to Ken (dark, mysterious Ken with a smile like a thousand stings) in any way.

She can't remember.

She wishes she knew. It should be easy. It used to be easy, in the days where she was so sick, so sick that she couldn't even kick a soccer ball correctly, but not anymore. Light is her crest, but light does not equal selflessness, and there are truths she can't depend on even Gatomon to tell her. So she wraps this up with all the other painful, sharp things, and locks it up inside her chest where no one will see.

Where no one will be hurt.